Friday, April 30, 2010

Lyndsey's Story - Bullying in School

I am telling my daughter's story because I have found that our schools do very little to protect of children from torment, harassment and just plain bullying. And the bad thing about Lyndsey's story is we, as Lyndsey's parents, were never notified that there was a problem at school - for TWO years. Now, thank goodness we have a very open and honest relationship with Lyndsey and she feels comfortable enough to come to us when she has problems, so we already knew everything, but when the issue arose again this year we finally had enough.

As most of you know the Houston area was hit hard by Hurricane Ike on September 13, 2008. Our schools were closed for approximately three (3) weeks due to damage. Up to this point Lyndsey had been growing her hair out to donate to Locks of Love (www.locksoflove.org). So, during her extended break from school we took the opportunity to have Lyndsey's hair cut and donated.








When Lyndsey returned to school with her short hair the rumors began to fly. All of a sudden she went from a "normal" girl to a lesbian and an "emo" girl (and for those of you who don't know like I didn't, an "emo" girl is one who is depressed and suicidal). Lyndsey was devastated! It really affected her self-confidence and self-esteem. She began to question herself and she said she had to watch every little thing she said because she didn't want people to take it the wrong way. This talk and torment went on for weeks until Lyndsey finally went to one of her PE coaches. Several girls were called in and it became a she said/I didn't said that war. Of course, we were NEVER notified by the coaches, principal or the counselor that any of this was going on (hmmm, wonder if the other girls parents were either?).

As time went on the rumors continued but in a more hush, hush form and Lyndsey learned to ignore it and just stayed among her good friends (and yes, she did lose some "friends" through all this). Once school was out Lyndsey had a few friends in which she hung out with during the summer and she got involved in swimming. Her self-esteem seemed to peek some but never back to where it once was.

Seventh grade begins. Lyndsey was nervous to go back to school in fear of what people might say about her. During the summer months she had refuse to cut her hair, even a trim, because she didn't want it too short. The year begins well. She falls back into a nice routine, makes some new friends and by Thanksgiving has her first "boyfriend," although Byron and I won't allow boyfriends yet so we called him her guy-friend. Anyway, they broke up a few months later, no big deal, until....she is now a bi-sexual and a lesbian. Now this is coming from boys and girls as she sits in class, walks down the hall, or is in PE. She turned in a group of kids, which one was sent to the office - again, we were NOT notified by school officials.

Lyndsey is a straight A student, a member of the Nations Junior Honor Society, a Lady Panther track team member and a all-around great girl who is being bullied for no apparent reason other than because these kids can. And what is so bad, us as parents aren't' being notified when our kids are having these types of issues at school. UNACCEPTABLE!!! I am going to work to change this problem. I am very proud of Lyndsey - she is a strong young lady who is doing things right is how she is handling her situation - but what about the kids who aren't' so strong? Whose parents aren't notified? What about the bully's? What about their parents, are they being notified of their children's actions? Are kids being taught tolerance of others? Are schools really paying attention to the issues at hand? Are parents doing their part? These are questions I want to work to answer and to help solve within our schools. No only for my daughter, but for all the kids affected by bullying!

1 comment:

kvedwards said...

Please keep doing something about this. It breaks my heart to hear all the hurtful things they are saying about Lyndsey. It is "Unacceptable". I am outraged!